Gotcha! Caught you blog reading. It’s Get Caught Reading Month — a nationwide campaign to remind people of all ages how much fun it is to read. Last year I did a zany series where an intrepid band of bloggers (and their pets!) tried to catch the illustrious Story Reading Ape in the act of reading. I’m rerunning those posts midweek, through May.
In case you didn’t know, Chris Graham is quite the story telling ape as well. You can get to know Chris better at his blog.
The Ape has honored us with a new short story! And he has included Pip, from The Three Things Serial Story. When I saw what Chris wrote I knew I had to make this a two-part post. So be looking for my part of this collaboration next weekend. Now without further ado, here’s a story from Chris Graham, the Story Reading Ape.
FORWARD to the PAST
Some weeks ago, while Chris, The Story Reading Ape was away, the Naughty Chimps took the opportunity to enjoy a bit of Nit Picking.
“You’ve been at the Honey Ants’ tree again, haven’t you, Cedric?”
“I suppose it’s the sticky clumps of hair that’s given the game away Malcolm?”
“Well, it wasn’t your ‘sweet nature’ – Har, Har”
Meanwhile, Aristotle the Scientific Genius, (Artie for short), was catching up with a bit of sleep.
He’d been working hard on the Time Machine he intended using to go back to the 1920’s and meet Paisley Idelle Peabody, aka Pip.
Ever since reading about her adventures in the Three Things Serial Story: A Little 1920’s Story, by Teagan Riordain Geneviene, he was determined to visit her and join in the fun.
The main problem was, the darn thing only went forwards in time, and only returned back to one second after he’d left and about 19 miles to the west for some reason. So he had to drag the thing back home every time he used it.
This was a great source of amusement to the others.
So he was hoping that a good nap would help his overworked brain sort out all the possibilities and arrive at an answer.
Many Zzzzzz’s later…
Artie woke up suddenly to the sound of the other chimps calling out his name.
“Wake up Artie – There’s a visitor here to see you – says he’s made a special trip to talk to you!”
Artie yawned, stretched, fell off his branch, sat up on the grass, scratched his armpit and opened his eyes to see someone watching. Someone who looked like his old Granddad.
“About time too, you lazy young chimp. How anything ever got made by you is beyond me,” barked the old one.
“Wazzup Grandad? I wasn’t really asleep, I was deep in ponderating thought!”
“Mind your manners and don’t try that excuse on me, you young rascal. I know exactly what you do during your ‘ponderating’ moments – I’ve come to tell you to stop wasting your time trying to go back to the 1920s!”
“Wadyamean, wasting my time – when I’ve solved the problems, I’ll be FAMOUS.”
“Oh, you’ll be famous ok, but for being such a Silly Billy for taking so long to figure out where you’ve been going wrong!”
“What do YOU know about it then GRANDAD?”
“Because, I’m YOU, from the future!”
Artie just stared agog at the old chimp as a myriad of thoughts whizzed through his mind.
“If you’re ME from the future, then it means I’ve solved the problem of Time Travel – YIPPEE!”
“Not so fast Knucklehead – you’ll never be able to travel back any further than the time you first started the Machine.”
“I don’t understand, why can’t I travel back further?”
“Because no Time Machines existed before then, so there are no connections in the Time/Space Continuum for you to use beyond that time,” explained the Old Artie.
“So THAT’S why I’m able to go FORWARDS in time, but always return to one second after I’ve departed?”
“Yes, and that’s also why you and the Machine always end up about 19 miles away to the West.” Old Artie confirmed.
“Earth revolves around the Sun at a speed of about 18.5 miles/sec (30 km/sec), plus, it rotates at about 0.25 miles/sec (0.46 km/sec),” Old RT explained, “Add the two together and the Earth has moved forwards AND rotated, about 18.75 miles in that one second”.
Young Artie’s legs gave way and he sat down with a thud. “So, I’ll never get to actually meet Pip?”, he cried plaintively.
“I’m afraid not – however, you CAN keep up date with her adventures, by tuning into Teagan’s blog every week and reading her ‘Little 1920’s Stories’ books.”
“That’s why I decided to risk everything by coming back to stop you wasting any more time on the Machine – I regret not spending more time reading.”
“But what will happen to YOU if I stop working on the Time Machine?” asked Young Artie.
“I’ll cease to exist as I currently am, but YOU will become a better old version when you reach my age” laughed Old Artie before he suddenly disappeared with a soft popping sound.
Nowadays, young Artie can often be found reading Teagan’s blog posts and books, as the Time Machine slowly gathers dust, termites and vines…
Copyright © 2017 by Chris Graham
“Hey, Teagan! Come on and wake up. Look, I know that nasty allergy-asthma thing has made you pos-i-lutely miserable for the past month. I know you’re exhausted from it, but get your head back to the Jazz Age. It’s me, Pip! Oh, horsefeathers!”
“Miss! Whatever is the matter? I could hear you all the way in my submarine… But the writer isn’t going to hear you. Her creative thoughts are as displaced as my scull.”
“Hey mister, who do you think you are, wriggling those bushy blonde eyebrows at me? But I guess you are sort of a sheik, in your own way. Oh, but poor Artie! Did you hear all that. The poor thing, trying so hard to meet me.”
“Now, now… surely it can’t be that bad. Although Artie does rather remind me of someone I once knew. Although that fellow’s complexion had an purplish cast… But wait. What’s that they have under all those vines? Oh my! Is that really a time machine? My dear, I am most intrigued. I think this situation warrants closer examination.”
“Oh, you are the cat’s pajamas, Mister erm…?”
“Cornelis Drebel, at your service, miss.”
Lord have mercy… It looks like my characters are crossing over story-lines and conspiring on their own. Stay tuned for next time. Same flapper time. Same flapper channel. Mega hugs!
Copyright © 2017 by Teagan Ríordáin Geneviene
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